It's been a long while, I know. And so much things have happened these past two weeks. I would so much be pleased to write all about them but I have very poor memory about events.

Half of this ordinary day was spent in a diagnostic center at Pedro Gil along Taft Avenue. Heidi and I went to have our regular medical exam. It was exhausting enough going up and down the office (from consultation room to the cashier to the x-ray room to the john to the laboratory room...) so we had to eat at Burger King across PGH for lunch. This fast food restaurant is among the most memorable places to me. During periodic exams in high school, MaScians gather inside BK to review (and eat) with friends hours before their test schedule. I used to go there with my friends and classmates who are especially genius in Calculus and Physics and AdChem and Com Sci and Linear Algebra and Analytic Geometry and many other subjects related to Math. I am quite a bonehead when it comes to numbers that's why I'm glad there are no math subjects in my course.

Just this week I had a first sincere talk with a good friend whom I have been classmates with for about two years. From our quiet conversation at the corner of the library he made me become conscious about the thing I call a crisis which I'm having unfortunately. I did not want to believe it at first but he had witty and justifiable proofs to this so I sort of gave in anyway. So the entire discussion boiled down to egocentricity. I did not care whether I caused people offense from trying to save my ego. Long story, people. With the 90/10 principle and other psychological theories as his basis, he said I have changed recently. Aside from telling me that my compensatory mechanisms toward all sorts of distresses are so lame, he also said that I'm now being selfish and apathetic and all that jazz. He could not understand me. Nor could I myself.

On Rhetoric class yesterday my teacher talked about communication. There's something in what she said about verbal and non-verbal communication that made me reflect on some personal issues. And then I discovered that the only way that I could be relieved of this 'crisis' is to make up for my faults (through actions or in words, I really don't know yet) as there is no way undoing them. (3 III 2005)